It Gets Better

On my worst days I wonder “would it really be so wrong?

If I took that curve a little too fast, a little too hard.

If I didn’t see the red light, or dead end sign when the road was long.

It was a decent try, but you let down your guard

Too fast, you let your heart stay open

Maybe it would beat better in another’s chest

Here we go, here’s hopin’

That I’ll finally get a little rest.

‘Cause staying up ‘til two and waking up at four

Can only last so long before I crash at dawn.”

And then I hear words slide through my head once more

“You’re not too far gone.

Swerve. Avoid that disaster.

It’s a new learning curve as you steer through life.

You’re still the master.

And even though you can still feel that knife

As it twists and falls from your hands,

You just have to find the light.”

It’s like I’m free falling through a dream afraid to land,

Afraid to discover that I still have to fight.

But it’s like someone else once said,

“Every time you make it through the dark,

You learn how to do it once more. Now go to bed.”

I’m stronger, I can make that spark.

And on my best days, I remember I made it through the worst.

I rebuild and remind myself that I’m still a work in progress.

Thanks, Marshall, you saved me with your verse.

I just have to take a breath and press

On through the flames and keep up the fight

‘Cause sometimes that’s the only way to make my own light.

 

 

 

The War

I wrote this poem a few weeks ago during a worship night with some incredible women. I didn’t realize then how often I would turn to these words and repeat them to myself. I hope they give even more strength and courage to whoever needs it. 

 

In the midst of the battle,
when I feel like I’ve lost,
I know You’re there.
When I crash to my knees,
and I’m too weak to fight,
I know You’re there.

You stand in my place.
You’re my shield and my sword.
And the war goes on.
I can hear Your battle cry.
I can rest in this moment.
I can cry out Your name,
And You’ll be there.

In the midst of the battle,
when I keep marching on,
I know You’re there.
When I face the new day,
and I’m not afraid,
It’s because You’re there.

You stand beside me.
You’re my courage and strength.
And the war goes on.
My cry echoes Yours.
We fight in this moment.
You spoke my name,
and You promised You’d always be there.

 

john 1_5.jpg